sabbath

One of my favorites about Christmas Morning each year is to get up before dawn and to savor some early morning time on my living room couch while the rest of the family sleeps.  The quiet of the house, a hot cup of coffee in my hands, the light and smells from the Christmas tree and cinnamon spiced candles, the afghan that my now-deceased-grandma made me when I was in high school, and the Word of God.  And if that isn't enough to thrill me, the brilliant orange sunrise that cut through the black outside was the absolute cherry on top of already delicious moments with God as He reminded me of the many gifts He gives us through Jesus Christ.

This Christmastime, while I'm thankful for times like these of solitude and slowing,  I've also been vexed these past few days by a gnawing sense of how behind I feel and the mountains of work I sense are ahead of me this winter/spring.  And as God knows us better than we know ourselves, He "randomly" led me this morning to a debriefing journal entry I wrote last February, after completing a forty day juice fast that He graced me with the ability to complete.  I'm quite certain it is His way of reminding me of the absolute necessity for Sabbath and for fasting/prayer in my life so that I don't get mixed up about who He is, about who I am, and our roles and responsibilities in light of these truths.

An excerpt from that journal entry:

"Sabbath.  Through the forty days, God brought much to me about Sabbath.  This was a surprise learning for me; I did not set out on this fast with “Sabbath” goals in mind.  I listened to a Tim Keller cd on Sabbath at Harvest.  I read through Genesis, Exodus, and Leviticus, and I was amazed at how much God brought up the command for Sabbath.  To cease from work.  To rest and trust in Him.  To remember Him and honor Him.  To remind us who is in charge and whose work it is.  To help us be God-centered rather than self-centered.  God knows human nature so completely.  He knew that He’d have to hammer this commandment because we would neglect it.   


Besides this teaching I received on Sabbath, the fasting itself produced in me so much more Sabbath than I ever would have experienced had I not been fasting.  Fasting has a way of slowing me down on the inside.  My RPM’s decrease dramatically.  I go to bed earlier.  I strive less and receive more.  I release.  I listen and watch more intently.  My prayers of “God, your will, your work, your way” are more genuinely uttered from my very core than just spoken from my lips.   Several mornings, I found myself on my couch curled up praying, “You, God.  I just want you.  My prayers might be all wrong, so just please give me You.  You work.  You lead.  You reveal.  You empower and fill me. “   There is something about fasting that helps me understand dependence on God and to rest in His power and work.  In Genesis 15:1 God says, “Do not be afraid, Abram.  I am your shield, your very great reward.”  God Himself is the reward of this fast.  Not what He can do but Him!  This was a very good “Sabbatical” for me even though I found myself in my office and at my computer through the 40 days.  I felt like I was truly retreating for many of the 40 days..." 

What disciplines and structures do I need in 2012 to help me be willing for God to be God in my life and work?  How about you?